The more you do for your kids the less they will do for themselves

My best lesson as a young black man was pretty much like Tre in boys in the hood raking the leaves.  As a kid I always go back to that because I remember being a kid and being told to rake all the leaves by myself.  It was a task that took more than a few days for one person, but I remember thinking I would never get it done.  Of course I was forced to keep working and eventually I finished the whole yard.  And I could remember feeling such a feeling of pride because I raked that whole yard by myself.  No help from my pops whom I considered lazy at the time, even though he paid all the bills.  I pretty much hated my dad the whole time I raked the yard, still hated him after I raked the yard. (not anymore of course)

The reason I am telling this story is because I want single moms to know that you have got to understand.  It’s okay if your precious babies are mad at you.  You have to teach them these life lessons because there is no other way to teach work ethic or tenacity.  And you don’t need to tell your kids that you’re trying to teach them lessons, because they won’t really care or get it.



Kids Playing Wavy Folio Fotography

© Wavy Folio Photography


I didn’t care and I didn’t get it until I was old enough to see how other adults acted that where not forced to do any chores at home.   I realized my work ethic came from the fact that I already knew that if I was patient and worked hard at something I would eventually get done no matter how big the task was.  That alone is a huge lesson that needs to be taught because that is the only way towards success without someone handing you a franchise.  But if everything is given to you, you won’t want to work towards anything because you’re just not used to that.  And we do what we are used to doing.  If you don’t get used to doing something when you’re young.  You probably won’t want to do it as an adult.  We are the reason for a kids culture shock.  And no I’m not a baller, and neither is my pops right now.  But I’m not a quitter, I’m still raking the leaves because of the feeling that I got when I finished raking the leaves.  The feeling of accomplishment is all I’m really chasing.  No matter how big of a loser you may think you are, you have moments of accomplishments.  And that is the place you should go when you’re feeling down.  You literally have no choice but to finish raking the leaves, if you do not stop.


Facebook Comments




  1. Jessica stevens

    December 1, 2017 at 7:46 pm

    This is so true, great article

    • wavyfolio

      December 11, 2017 at 11:20 am

      Thank you Jessica! glad you liked it.

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